Permission to Bloom with ADHD: Embrace Growth, Confidence, and Change
You may have heard the phrase, “Bloom where you are planted.” We might also say, “Plant yourself where you will bloom.” For adults with ADHD, there may be another take, “Give yourself permission to bloom”.
I started buying indoor plants some years ago, after my mom died and my son went away to college. Tending to my large plant family has been a nurturing, calming endeavor, and nothing is more exciting than when a plant blooms!
Lessons from Plants
A few things I have learned as a plant lover: lighting matters, feeding and watering is important, they need pruning from time to time, you have to watch out for pests, extra support like a pole is sometimes needed, you might need to repot if your plant is rootbound, plants like a summer vacation outdoors, and you just can’t rush blooming!
Likewise, we humans benefit from being in light, we know that eating and hydration is important, we sometimes need redirecting or fresh perspectives, we try to limit exposure to toxic people or influences, sometimes we need to branch out, rest is important, and timing is everything! There might however be one more important point to consider!
Risk to Bloom
Therapist Sari Solden wrote an article called, “Risk to Bloom” especially for adults with ADHD, many of whom were diagnosed later in life.
Having worked with and observed the struggles of clients without the benefit of early diagnosis, she witnessed confusion, misunderstanding and masking, all of which left them “locked up as if in a tight bud”. To bloom would reveal what they considered to be faults and vulnerabilities they worked so hard to hide in order to self-protect.
“There was a great price however in hiding and sacrificing who they (clients) really were, their very sense of self.”
- Sari Solden
Clients would “open up” when it was more painful not to, finally stepping forward to be seen, heard, and known.
“And the day came when the risk to remain in a tight bud was more painful that the risk it took to blossom.”
- Anais Nin
Solden cautions us to beware of other flowers that can drain us of necessary nutrients, the need to move slowly and gradually to brighter growing conditions, as well as to seek the support of a master gardener to grow into our most authentic flower.
Under which conditions do you bloom? What makes you come to life? Where is staying stuck more painful than creating change? Who can help?
You might have risked stepping forward to get an official diagnosis because life with untreated ADHD had become unmanageable. You might have lived below potential and now that you realize the role ADHD has played in your life, you expect and feel deserving of more. Each step forward yields confidence and fosters new growth. This spring let’s take a “risk to bloom!”
“Only you can give yourself permission to take the first step toward a life of passion, purpose and possibility”
- David Giwerc, MCC
Click here to schedule a FREE consultation and get support in taking the first step!
Resources
Risk to Bloom- Sari Solden (article)
Women with ADHD- Sari Solden (book)
Journeys Through Adulthood- Sari Solden (book)
A Radical Guide for Women with ADHD: Embrace Neurodiversity, Live Boldly and Break Through Barriers- Sari Solden, MS (book)
Permission to Proceed- David Giwerc (book)